It was only a name...

My mother-in-law died April 16 of this year, a severe loss to our entire family. When she married she acquired "the curse" of her husband's family - a vagrant "e" in the last name that any German Jew would instantly recognize and acknowledge, but that was strangely out of place in American. My father-in-law, who predeceased her by over 10 years, was very particular about that "e". It was his connection with his forefathers, his extended family, his German-Jewish origins.

Lilo wholeheartedly embraced her married name with the awkwardly placed "e" (in German it would have formed an umlau or some such thing). Her passport, Social Security Card, Medicare Card, membership cards, credit cards, bank accounts, insurance policies all included the "e" in her last name.

Inexplicably, her death certificate did not! My brother-in-law tried to correct the error and the best the bureaucracy would do was add an a/k/a which listed the correct spelling. Not pleasant, but at least it was there.

When Probate Court finally, after 3 1/2 inexplicably long months of deliberation or pure and simple inattention, finally released the Letters of Testamentary they listed her name as listed on the death certificate but mistyped the a/k/a, so that both versions omitted the notorious "e". The result? All estate documentation and correspondence must now list first her correct spelling (as given in her will) and then the two spurious spellings as a/k/a.

My family thinks I am nuts to be upset about this. But she did not have any aliases or a/k/a's during her lifetime. She was VERY particular about making sure ALL her documents included the CORRECT spelling of her last name. Don't these bureaucratic agencies ever proof their work? How difficult would it be to correct it? It would probably take additional months and months of squabbling that we feel totally unequipped to endure.

My mother-in-law was not rich, famous, politically powerful. But she was an incredibly important person in our lives. I feel like she was disrespected in death and this casual negligence infuriates me!